The mud

been having a few really bad days. tired and flushed. maybe a little feverish. i can't put my finger on it, which is how it usually is, I guess. i fear that maybe it's part stress related. could it be? sure it could. but this is not close to one of my more stressful periods, so im half thinking and half hoping its just a bug. some virus bringing me down, messing with my mind.
today, the Girl stopped by. i leaned in close to feel her breath on my face as she spoke. she made me feel a lot better while she was here.
now I've watched casino royale, and was it good? well, it was bond thats for sure. they seem to have settled on a recipe that works. the initial chase scene was well choreographed, stunning stunt work. the babes were babes, but less exposure than lately? and naturally couldn't be trusted. it's no fun being bond, whether he likes it or not, it's short term relationships for life.
i hope to get out of this muddy sink hole i am in right now. i always think back to the analysis we made while reading the remake och robinson crusoe by whatshisname, some french guy, in french class. robinson had a period when all he did was sit in a hole of mud, trying to not think, just drifting away slowly from life. finally he took a hold of himself and got out though. maybe I will too.
my back hurts lika a b'tch also, cuz I havent been making it to the gym for a few weeks. it just piles up and makes me want to explode it.

that same old burroghs line is ringing in my head, and im not sure he didn't borrow it from hemingway:
"it came in a puff
the wind that makes the candle flicker
a sudden evil-smelling emptyness"
on that note, let's all have a care-free weekend.