I am having a shitty weekend. But only on the inside.
Friday night, went out with some friends to kalmar nation. good fun. missed both the bands cause i was drunk and completely lost in conversation. and also i didn't care about the bands, never having heard of them before. in all i guess it was a good night, i like the people i was with, but i was just a twist to pissed.
which i felt the day after. with a pounding headache i went downtown with my photofriends and joined in a photo-marathon: 12 themes, in order, to be captured on twelve consecutive frames of film. quite a challenge and fun. pictures will be scanned and posted when i have them.
then, last night, we had a photo-party and went out at the norrlands nation. the party was good. and i had a great little pocket of time with my Girl, between the time she left her dinner and when she had to start working. we snuck into a dark, small, upstairs kitchen. metal benches. people passing by outside.
but then, she started working and the night started sucking. the music was horrible. i had gotten sober. i felt out of touch with my friends. and my girl had let slip that she had to meet two other people on sunday, and i felt that cold feeling coming that means we'd not have any time for us. so i went home. to sleep.
and then i've spent this day hoping for her to call. walking a bit in the sun. baking some pastries with my friends. but just feeling like shit.
the Girl did call, but with no invitation or anything. so, now i'm a little grumpy with her, but she promised to make it up to me tomorrow.
i'm not that cool when it comes to being stood up, when it comes to being a low priority. not cool at all. it just drains me.
and then there's the fact that it's february, and i had too much to drink on friday. it just stays with me. drained and gasping for air.
i know it probably doesn't make sense to have this kind of weekend and feel like i feel, but there it is. the Girl is so important, and i just feel like i'm not. yeah. cocky ladiesman, eh?
night
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i see the moon and the moon sees me
and the moon sees the one i want to see