I got to get stoned or I can't go
to sleep
Tears for Fears
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
That the dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
Bo Sundström aka Bo-Kasper
Om vi kör ihjäl oss, gör vi det med flit.
(If we die in a car crash, we do it on purpose)
Ani Difranco
Strangers are exciting
their mystery never ends
but there's nothing like looking at your own history
in the faces of your friends
their mystery never ends
but there's nothing like looking at your own history
in the faces of your friends
I stole this to make you happy
do you choose the plastic?
or the real?
man i choose the plastic.
---
You see, I try not to speak of that. I find it tends to poison the genial atmosphere at the dinner table. It is very, very dull. And largely irrelevant, both to myself and to the people I know. And anyway, I can hardly keep my food down after some of the things people come out with.
---
I work for a very large company. I worry that I may lose my job. I worry about the consequences of my actions. Sometimes I am terrified of getting out of bed in the morning. I often dream of headless horsemen. I am not good to be around when the moon is full. I haven't had any good action in months.
give me more
so local even the seagulls are bored
however I am longing for the summer. For vacation, for the North, for fresh air, sun, seagulls, wooden houses, grass, the Sea, salt, seaweed, kayaking, boating, staying up all night, swimming, taking saunas, driving around. Ice cream, and milk shakes. Coffee in the sun. Picnic lunches, walking through woods. Getting wet and rained on. Seeing new rivers and mountains. Going out without a jacket, being barefoot, hot sand, hot rocks, icy cold water. Beaches, volleyboll, tans and sunglasses. Reading books, listening to the summer radio show, listening to Spanarna. Ice tea, cold beer, moms homemade lemonade.
the OVEN
This weekend we got a bar. The Kollektiv is shaping up. Donated by Alyss' friend, since it had been left by some previous tenant in the basement storage unit. It was heavy as a cow, but once it was in place there was this loud click. Not of something breaking, but of something really fitting in place. We reorganized some of the other stuff and soon our disordered living room had transformed into the Oven, a bar, a lounge, and a TV/gaming area. With the soon expected EXODUS of A's left furniture which take up a fair bit of floor space, we will add a dining area as well. The three seating areas will by surrounding the bar, which will make up the new hub, the new heart, of our little lives. I'll try and post some pictures of it soon.
And naturally, as soon as this is organized, a proper inauguration will take place at the Oven. We've even talked of getting a proper bar service going on a small scale. That is, investing a little money in getting wine and beer for the bar, and then selling it to ourselves and our friends when the need comes on.
And naturally, as soon as this is organized, a proper inauguration will take place at the Oven. We've even talked of getting a proper bar service going on a small scale. That is, investing a little money in getting wine and beer for the bar, and then selling it to ourselves and our friends when the need comes on.
Sonic blast
I felt the reeling coming. As I often do. So I stumbled home, mumbled goodbye to no one in particular. And then I couldn't remember struggling to take off the necklace. Or brushing my teeth. Or being rude, loud and filmed. At some point this has got to stop.
Rambling
Why is it when you stop keeping your rain clothes in your bag that the weather turns?
Why is it that the sun shines at two, but when you want to go home at five, it's pouring down rain?
Well, it's just plain good luck then, that I wont go home just now...
--
I just started playing Devil May Cry on our pink playstation 2. It's seems like an alright action game. So far I exspecially enjoy jumping up in the air and fire a sawed-off shotgun in a suspended-motion-matrix-kind-of-way. Man, the world is dangerously loosing it's foothold (considering recent events), and I'm just here, a part of all the downfall. Because, although I don't really believe that videogames and movies cause violence, they do twist your mind a bit. And volatile souls will end up causing blowouts. The problem of course is What causes all these kids to feel so lousy? Alienated, filled with anxiety and hate. That's the part that is new. Not the violent games (when I was a kid I would run around in the woods with two sticks and a piece of string, fighting the most elaborate battles. 3D acceleration didn't change my life.). The guns are another issue. Fuckin americans (the system, not the people). Can you spell indoctrination? Can you spell delusion? Yous guys aint free one bit. You're cancerous. You're a rabid dog. The whole nation is like a mean little kid with daddys guns, holding the world at bay.
Well, that got away from me.
I guess videogames make you mad.
(and outside, the rain is so hard that the car alarms are going off.. note to self, if you need to steal a car: do it in heavy rainfall)
Why is it that the sun shines at two, but when you want to go home at five, it's pouring down rain?
Well, it's just plain good luck then, that I wont go home just now...
--
I just started playing Devil May Cry on our pink playstation 2. It's seems like an alright action game. So far I exspecially enjoy jumping up in the air and fire a sawed-off shotgun in a suspended-motion-matrix-kind-of-way. Man, the world is dangerously loosing it's foothold (considering recent events), and I'm just here, a part of all the downfall. Because, although I don't really believe that videogames and movies cause violence, they do twist your mind a bit. And volatile souls will end up causing blowouts. The problem of course is What causes all these kids to feel so lousy? Alienated, filled with anxiety and hate. That's the part that is new. Not the violent games (when I was a kid I would run around in the woods with two sticks and a piece of string, fighting the most elaborate battles. 3D acceleration didn't change my life.). The guns are another issue. Fuckin americans (the system, not the people). Can you spell indoctrination? Can you spell delusion? Yous guys aint free one bit. You're cancerous. You're a rabid dog. The whole nation is like a mean little kid with daddys guns, holding the world at bay.
Well, that got away from me.
I guess videogames make you mad.
(and outside, the rain is so hard that the car alarms are going off.. note to self, if you need to steal a car: do it in heavy rainfall)
Peek-a-boo
I had great success on holiday. Please to see pictures here.
-.-
In my professional capacity I am finally writing on another article. So far I don't have a publication in mind, so we'll just have to see what the outcome is and then what possible media are available.
-.-
hmm.
yesterday I took the missus for a drive around the Uppland landscape. Man, it is booring around theses parts. I mean no offence, but I really do prefer the north. Or the coast. Or the mountains. Well, we had some bad luck driving around looking for a nice spot to park the car en subsequently our asses for a picnic lunch. Until we finally reached a 14th century church which was nicely situated. We sat on the lawn next to the public lavatory and picnic:d and listened to the pine cones pop and the pheasants craw. No not the peasants, the pheasants. Then we went on to a second hand shop, a huge farm converted into store/warehouse for clothes, furniture, anything really, as it should be. As usual I couldn't keep from buying some stuff, and I think I found some nice shit. A fabulous, salmon coloured shirt; some books; and a beautiful coffee table. (wait.. i gotta take a picture of the f*cker..)
There.. pretty cool huh? It's like one of those old time world maps. With text written in like latin n sh*t. Problem is, right now I've got nowhere to put it so it'll just have to reside under my bed until I get a place of my own.
On our way home we passed by an old mill and stuck our feet in the freezing water...
It was coold.
-.-
-.-
In my professional capacity I am finally writing on another article. So far I don't have a publication in mind, so we'll just have to see what the outcome is and then what possible media are available.
-.-
hmm.
yesterday I took the missus for a drive around the Uppland landscape. Man, it is booring around theses parts. I mean no offence, but I really do prefer the north. Or the coast. Or the mountains. Well, we had some bad luck driving around looking for a nice spot to park the car en subsequently our asses for a picnic lunch. Until we finally reached a 14th century church which was nicely situated. We sat on the lawn next to the public lavatory and picnic:d and listened to the pine cones pop and the pheasants craw. No not the peasants, the pheasants. Then we went on to a second hand shop, a huge farm converted into store/warehouse for clothes, furniture, anything really, as it should be. As usual I couldn't keep from buying some stuff, and I think I found some nice shit. A fabulous, salmon coloured shirt; some books; and a beautiful coffee table. (wait.. i gotta take a picture of the f*cker..)
There.. pretty cool huh? It's like one of those old time world maps. With text written in like latin n sh*t. Problem is, right now I've got nowhere to put it so it'll just have to reside under my bed until I get a place of my own.
On our way home we passed by an old mill and stuck our feet in the freezing water...
It was coold.-.-
Introducing model tag team with photos from epic journey
Master Chief stressing the importance of physical fitness when working as a fire fighter
Shane taking in the sun in Röjnoret
Master Chief and Shane doing their "Cliffhanger" impression
MC scouting for wild animals
Chocolate Easter Bunny faces the grim prospect of being eaten.
A proud Master Chief beholds the beauty of the Swedish countryside during our journey south
Master Chief getting jiggy wid it---
More photos to follow. Now its time for sleep or something like it.
Boom-shak-a-lak
You think you'll be strong and indifferent. That it wont really affect you. And then you stand there and it is all so o very real. And hard as f*ckin flint and smooth as f*ckin silk. And it really takes more than conviction, more than safe, sane, stability to keep walking. Anyway.
The weekend has landed
Friday.
The remarkable spring weather continues here in Uppsala. Everyone seems, and probably is, happier and more light-hearted. I wore shorts outside yesterday for the first time this year. And it wasn't that bad. As I was cycling home I found myself challengning the people I passed with a defiant look. Many heads were shook.
-
My talk yesterday went quite well. Their was some sort of reporter there, and he kept trying to make smart-ass questions (to most of the speakers). He asked me why his golf course couldn't use solar power to pump up some sort of irrigation waters, because of the large surface areas it would need. How the H*ll am I supposed to know? What kind of pump did he use? What sort of power did he need? No specifications, he just wanted solar to look bad. Of course, any sort of smart answer didn't come to me at the time, and I just stood there, stumped, and said I couldn't really make any comments on that particular case. Fortunately, there was a woman involved in solar present and she pointed out that using solar for water pumps was actually a very common application in developing countries. Thanks for having my back.
In general, the whole seminar was interesting, I got to learn some stuff about other renewable energy suorces and the possibilities that lie ahead. And there was no outward conflict between the different technologies, something that comes up surprisingly often at other times. There seemed to be room for all renewable alternatives.
---
Then yesterday evening we were invited with our foto club to a chocolate tasting event at the local photoshop. Very nice..
Opps, gotta work.
Bye
The remarkable spring weather continues here in Uppsala. Everyone seems, and probably is, happier and more light-hearted. I wore shorts outside yesterday for the first time this year. And it wasn't that bad. As I was cycling home I found myself challengning the people I passed with a defiant look. Many heads were shook.
-
My talk yesterday went quite well. Their was some sort of reporter there, and he kept trying to make smart-ass questions (to most of the speakers). He asked me why his golf course couldn't use solar power to pump up some sort of irrigation waters, because of the large surface areas it would need. How the H*ll am I supposed to know? What kind of pump did he use? What sort of power did he need? No specifications, he just wanted solar to look bad. Of course, any sort of smart answer didn't come to me at the time, and I just stood there, stumped, and said I couldn't really make any comments on that particular case. Fortunately, there was a woman involved in solar present and she pointed out that using solar for water pumps was actually a very common application in developing countries. Thanks for having my back.
In general, the whole seminar was interesting, I got to learn some stuff about other renewable energy suorces and the possibilities that lie ahead. And there was no outward conflict between the different technologies, something that comes up surprisingly often at other times. There seemed to be room for all renewable alternatives.
---
Then yesterday evening we were invited with our foto club to a chocolate tasting event at the local photoshop. Very nice..
Opps, gotta work.
Bye
Lost in translation
Sorry this only works in swedish:
Lyssnar precis på Ekot i P1 och i en intervju ställer reportern frågan:
-Vad tror du att det här betyder för svinen på Alliansen?
Tyvärr så hörde jag fel, och han sa egentligen
-Vad tror du att det här betyder för synen på Alliansen?
Lyssnar precis på Ekot i P1 och i en intervju ställer reportern frågan:
-Vad tror du att det här betyder för svinen på Alliansen?
Tyvärr så hörde jag fel, och han sa egentligen
-Vad tror du att det här betyder för synen på Alliansen?
Low blood, sugar
I am feeling faint. My heartbeats seem to big for my body. Light and large, like batting wings of a big butterfly. If I stand still I can feel how each beat is swaying my body back and forth. Like a flag pole without a flag. As I gaze out to the parking lot, the sky above is steel gray. Somewhere there must be a sun shining. I can see a tiny star, reflected cautiously in the red varnish of a delivery van.
Debauchery
Your blouse your skirt
I'll undo them so gentle
With beautiful care
I'm a lonely man
With five bottles of wine
I'd like you to share
Praise
If you haven't, listen to Jeff Buckleys version of Leonard Cohens Halelujah. Most people who covered the song did so on Jeff Buckleys altered version and not the Cohen original. And fair enough, the lyrics are more complex and the performance is amazing. My second favourite is the version by Elisa, and the original comes in a bronze medal.
Just a tip.
Just a tip.
Up
Some news:
-In about a week I'll hold a talk in Sthlm for something called Energipuls, arranged by Energiledargruppen. I'll talk about solar cells, how the world market and the technology has evolved in the roughly 50 years since the first cell was made at Bell labs in the 50s, why it isn't cheap, and why it will only get cheaper.
-Then, at the end of march I'll go to Ghent in Belgium for a workshop on thin film solar cell modelling (with computers that is). It looks like a pretty city and I think it will be a good, worthwhile thing to do. + it's been too long since I was travelling and I sure am looking forward to the brief pause and opening of the eyes that it usually means.
---
The Knife:
-In about a week I'll hold a talk in Sthlm for something called Energipuls, arranged by Energiledargruppen. I'll talk about solar cells, how the world market and the technology has evolved in the roughly 50 years since the first cell was made at Bell labs in the 50s, why it isn't cheap, and why it will only get cheaper.
-Then, at the end of march I'll go to Ghent in Belgium for a workshop on thin film solar cell modelling (with computers that is). It looks like a pretty city and I think it will be a good, worthwhile thing to do. + it's been too long since I was travelling and I sure am looking forward to the brief pause and opening of the eyes that it usually means.
---
The Knife:
"For a reasonable salary
I will wash the world"
The mud
been having a few really bad days. tired and flushed. maybe a little feverish. i can't put my finger on it, which is how it usually is, I guess. i fear that maybe it's part stress related. could it be? sure it could. but this is not close to one of my more stressful periods, so im half thinking and half hoping its just a bug. some virus bringing me down, messing with my mind.
today, the Girl stopped by. i leaned in close to feel her breath on my face as she spoke. she made me feel a lot better while she was here.
now I've watched casino royale, and was it good? well, it was bond thats for sure. they seem to have settled on a recipe that works. the initial chase scene was well choreographed, stunning stunt work. the babes were babes, but less exposure than lately? and naturally couldn't be trusted. it's no fun being bond, whether he likes it or not, it's short term relationships for life.
i hope to get out of this muddy sink hole i am in right now. i always think back to the analysis we made while reading the remake och robinson crusoe by whatshisname, some french guy, in french class. robinson had a period when all he did was sit in a hole of mud, trying to not think, just drifting away slowly from life. finally he took a hold of himself and got out though. maybe I will too.
my back hurts lika a b'tch also, cuz I havent been making it to the gym for a few weeks. it just piles up and makes me want to explode it.
that same old burroghs line is ringing in my head, and im not sure he didn't borrow it from hemingway:
today, the Girl stopped by. i leaned in close to feel her breath on my face as she spoke. she made me feel a lot better while she was here.
now I've watched casino royale, and was it good? well, it was bond thats for sure. they seem to have settled on a recipe that works. the initial chase scene was well choreographed, stunning stunt work. the babes were babes, but less exposure than lately? and naturally couldn't be trusted. it's no fun being bond, whether he likes it or not, it's short term relationships for life.
i hope to get out of this muddy sink hole i am in right now. i always think back to the analysis we made while reading the remake och robinson crusoe by whatshisname, some french guy, in french class. robinson had a period when all he did was sit in a hole of mud, trying to not think, just drifting away slowly from life. finally he took a hold of himself and got out though. maybe I will too.
my back hurts lika a b'tch also, cuz I havent been making it to the gym for a few weeks. it just piles up and makes me want to explode it.
that same old burroghs line is ringing in my head, and im not sure he didn't borrow it from hemingway:
"it came in a puffon that note, let's all have a care-free weekend.
the wind that makes the candle flicker
a sudden evil-smelling emptyness"
Silence is easy
I felt the urge to tip you off on some other nice guitarpeople I've had earsex with recently:
Turin Brakes, their album Ethersong (from back in the day) is weeely nice, as is the Starsailor album Silence is easy. I think they're both british groups, and kind of similar (I suspect some form of link between them..). Like Coldplay but not.. you know, worn out and really really boring. Really good songwriting anyway.
Check out:
www.turinbrakes.com
www.starsailor.net
I've been trying to get into Death Cab for Cutie last week, but.. frankly I find them really really boring. I don't get what all the fuzz was about. Whenever it was that everybody were fussing over them.
Along with aformentioned Jeff Harms a friend of mine burned me some M Ward. Since the songs didn't have any info, it took a while to extract enough evidence from them to be able to decide which songs were made by which artist. But now, as I am getting there, I have to say that M Ward also seems to quite the capable captain. Check out his Myspace here, or his website here.
Now I feel like I am inefficient enough to maybe go home... or something. Later this evening I am shooting some people at Norrlands. Yeah, with a camera that is.
Peace
Turin Brakes, their album Ethersong (from back in the day) is weeely nice, as is the Starsailor album Silence is easy. I think they're both british groups, and kind of similar (I suspect some form of link between them..). Like Coldplay but not.. you know, worn out and really really boring. Really good songwriting anyway.
Check out:
www.turinbrakes.com
www.starsailor.net
I've been trying to get into Death Cab for Cutie last week, but.. frankly I find them really really boring. I don't get what all the fuzz was about. Whenever it was that everybody were fussing over them.
Along with aformentioned Jeff Harms a friend of mine burned me some M Ward. Since the songs didn't have any info, it took a while to extract enough evidence from them to be able to decide which songs were made by which artist. But now, as I am getting there, I have to say that M Ward also seems to quite the capable captain. Check out his Myspace here, or his website here.
Now I feel like I am inefficient enough to maybe go home... or something. Later this evening I am shooting some people at Norrlands. Yeah, with a camera that is.
Peace
What I meant to write yesterday
Your wealth made from rags, from nothing into something grand-That Jeff guy
You promise them they'll live in castles wooing men from far off lands
They raise you up like a God unto your tiny little stand
Until their faith once like a rock is ground up turning into sand
They scour the earth for the things they saw in your tiny little hands
You see they're old enough to dream but just to young to understand
Gabriella, was this all part of your plan?
All the strength was going out of him in waves of seering pain
The past couple of weeks my stress levels have been gradually rising. Almost unnoticed, and certainly not counteracted, they have now reached annoying intensity. It's that really sh*tty kind of stress where I feel bad because I'm not doing enough to push work forward. I have some good ideas, sure, some leads and some interesting investigations ahead of me. Yet the days ease by me like a fat dirty river, leaving me feeling behind, lost and sick. And I see my collegues, as well as friends and people unknown to me in respects other than visual, gladly jump in and swim with the current.
I need someone to cut me a path.
And of course at this time when I'd rather take some extra time and energy and invest it in my work situation, my extra-curricular obligations conicide by being beautifully intensified. Tomorrow we have an (emergency?) meeting with the photo club, hopefully electing a new president since our current one has defected. Friend opening a club on friday, and I should be there (hey, I even want to) followed by a saturday that is completely booked by my duties as photographer for Norrlands Nation. Since it's an all-night event I probably will be hungover and certainly tired on sunday, i.e. not really in a working mode or mood. Which means I'll end up pushing things onward to next week hoping they'll resolve, time will be plentyful, my actions will yield immediate results and kings will come and bow before me.
Or so we hope.
Nuff said.
M'out
I need someone to cut me a path.
And of course at this time when I'd rather take some extra time and energy and invest it in my work situation, my extra-curricular obligations conicide by being beautifully intensified. Tomorrow we have an (emergency?) meeting with the photo club, hopefully electing a new president since our current one has defected. Friend opening a club on friday, and I should be there (hey, I even want to) followed by a saturday that is completely booked by my duties as photographer for Norrlands Nation. Since it's an all-night event I probably will be hungover and certainly tired on sunday, i.e. not really in a working mode or mood. Which means I'll end up pushing things onward to next week hoping they'll resolve, time will be plentyful, my actions will yield immediate results and kings will come and bow before me.
Or so we hope.
Nuff said.
M'out
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